Love Is In The Air: Valentines Day is Not Just For Lovers

In his book, The Road Less Traveled, Scott Peck says love is, “The will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth” We don’t have to be “in love” to give or receive love. Love can be expressed in our words and actions to many, including ourselves in addition to our partners, lovers and spouses. When we celebrate Valentine’s Day we think of our significant others, but there are so many more who are also significant that can be loved by us including our pets, our friends, neighbors, employers, employees, extended family members and even the people who take care of our needs. I love my doctors for their concern for my well-being. I love my hair designer for making me feel beautiful. I love my gardener for making my courtyard so lovely, and thank God for my handyman, webmaster, housekeeper, plumber and dog sitter. The list goes on.

What is Intimacy

When we think of intimacy, Maria Teresa Chavez says, “People think that intimacy is about sex. But intimacy is about truth. When you realize you can tell someone your truth, when you can show yourself to them, when you stand in front of them and their response is “you’re safe with me”-that’s INTIMACY. INTIMACY, often coined, “in to me see” is revealing your essence—your authenticity. So many of us are fearful of revealing ourselves for fear of rejection, judgment or criticism. What does it mean to love ourselves? It does not mean narcissism. It means to know oneself, to embrace and acknowledge our dark side. It means to accept ourselves unconditionally, with making the changes that we feel will help us to become the best we can be.

A Conscious Relationship

It’s having a conscious relationship with ourselves in order to have a conscious relationship with others. In my book, Do You Hate the One You Love: Strategies For Healing and Saving Your Relationship., I share the groundwork and journey to create and maintain meaningful relationships. I hope you will read my book and if you find it helpful and informative, it will make a great gift for Valentine’s Day to your beloved, bequeathed, bashert, kindred spirit, soulmate and the love of your life. We cannot have a conscious relationship with another until we have one with ourselves!

Make this Valentine’s Day very special and you just might receive the love that you have been waiting for. Happy Valentine’s Day to my followers, Facebook friends, family and clients. AS Jimmy says, “Make Someone Happy!”

Joan E Childs, LCSW is a renowned psychotherapist, inspirational speaker and author of Do You Hate the One You Love: Strategies For Healing and Saving Your Relationship. In private practice since 1978, she specializes in individual and couple’s therapy, grief therapy, EMDR, NLP, inner child work and codependency. Learn more about her services at www.joanechilds.com.