Celebrating Our First Love… Our Moms

A Mother is she who can take the place of all others
but whose place no one can take.”
– Cardinal Mermillod

Wishing all mothers, grandmas, great grandmas and fur baby mamas a wonderful celebration on this very special day!

Having been the mother of five fabulous children has been a blessing and the greatest and most important part of my life. I feel blessed to have been given the gift of life. It wasn’t easy, but I would do it all again!

It all began on October 1, 1963 at the age of 24 and didn’t stop until I had my fifth and final child on February 8, 1972. I had a full house with queens on top: three girls and two boys, all in 8+ years. I am thankful for my youth and innocence because I had no clue what was ahead of me. I was a divorced mom of five, and countless fur babies, half of which I never knew were in our home as the kids had a clever way of sneaking them in surreptitiously and hiding them. I was labeled the crazy lady with the five crazy kids that climbed in and out of the windows. They all had a proclivity for losing their house keys and it didn’t take me long to learn that supplying them with new keys was not the answer.

A working mom, sometimes holding down 3 jobs at a time created many challenges. I worked as a home health provider, a substitute teacher all the while struggling to build a private practice. After all, what does a 5- or 8-year-old know about Florida Power and Light and mortgage payments. They only knew that Mom was never home.

After the divorce I entered a master in social work program at Barry University, then Barry College. Between the divorce and working 3 jobs, the kids had to manage on their own, feeling the wounds of their motherless and fatherless childhood. However, in spite of their adversity, love kept us together, not without the trials and tribulations of managing motherhood and career. I laugh when I think of the presentations, I gave on managing motherhood and career. I now know that it is an unmanageable challenge with repercussions loaded with abandonment issues that can stay with kids for many years.

Despite the challenges and deprivations, we made it work. Today my children are fabulous adults, each successful human beings. It was the unyielding love that made it work. It is that love that keeps us all for one and one for all today!

Now in my eighties I look back in awe and wonder how did I do it? Children need to feel they matter! They need time, attention, self-value and much more. Meeting the needs of children with so many responsibilities felt like I was the old woman in the shoe who had so many children, she didn’t know what to do!

So now, 50 plus years later, all the effort, trials and tribulations, heartbreaks and heartaches are part of the fabric that keeps us together. It’s love that heals! It’s love that matters!

So, to all of you moms out there, celebrate your blessings for having perhaps the most precious and cherished gifts in life… that of being a mother.

Click to read my May 2021 Newsletter

 

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Joan E Childs, LCSW is a renowned psychotherapist, inspirational speaker and author of Do You Hate the One You Love: Strategies For Healing and Saving Your Relationship. In private practice since 1978, she specializes in individual and couple’s therapy, grief therapy, EMDR, NLP, inner child work and codependency. Learn more about her services at www.joanechilds.com.